Fatwa No : 87229
Demanding khulaʿ due to a husband’s bad behavior

Demanding khulaʿ due to a husband’s bad behavior

I am 21 years old and I am married. My marriage took place in December 2022. It was a love marriage, but now I am not happy in this marriage. I have been facing difficulties since the very beginning of the marriage. I have a daughter who is 1 year and 9 months old. There is no peace or love in this marriage; it is just a relationship that we are dragging along, and we live like roommates. I only fulfill his needs and perform my duty, but I am not happy. I have been subjected to mental torture and physical abuse. He only wants to show his power. He has never fulfilled his responsibilities as a husband. I have involved my own family and my in-laws many times in this matter, but they always tell me to be patient, saying that he is a man and that this is men’s habit.
My question is: does patience mean that one must endure mental abuse and humiliation? Is this what Islam teaches? He often comments on my character and my physical appearance, mocks me, and says that he is just joking. His behavior toward my daughter is also not good. So what should I do in these circumstances? Is khulaʿ permissible in such a situation?
I will be waiting for your reply.
May Allah reward you.”

الجوابُ حامِدا ًو مُصلیِّا ً

If the statement of the questioner is correct and based on truth, and no falsehood has been included in it, then in such a case the husband’s mentioned behavior is extremely inappropriate. Rather, due to violating the wife’s rights, he is also committing sin. It is necessary for him to sincerely repent and seek forgiveness, and in the future to be mindful of the rights of his wife and child. He should also seek forgiveness from his wife for the negligence and shortcomings that have occurred so far.
At the same time, the questioner should also try to remove any shortcomings found on her part, if any exist, and attempt to find a way toward reconciliation and settlement through the elders of the family.
However, if despite every possible effort the husband’s behavior does not change, and in such a situation it becomes impossible for the questioner to continue living with him while observing the limits set by Allah, and she does not fear any major harm or calamity as a result of separation, then she may demand divorce or khulaʿ from her husband. From a Shariah perspective, she will not be sinful for making such a demand.”

مأخَذُ الفَتوی

كما في سنن ابي داود عن حليم بن معاوية القشيرى عن ابيه قال : قلت : یا رسول الله ما حق زوجة احدنا عليه ؟ قال : ان تطعمها إذا طعمت وتكسوها إذا اکتسيت - أو : اکسبت - ولا تضرب الوجه۔ ولا تقبح ولا تهجر الا في البيت (باب في حق المرأة على زجها . ج :1 ص: ۸۹۹،ح : ۳۱۴۲)
وفي سنن أبي داود عن عائشة رضى الله عنها أن حبيبة بنت سهل كانت عند ثابت بن قيس بن شماس فضربہا فکسر بعدہا ،فات النبی صلی اللہ علیہ اسلم بعد الصبح فاشتکلتہ الیہ فدعا النبی ثابتا فقال خذ بعض مالہا و فارقہا فقال : یصلھ ذٰلک رسول اللہ ؟ قال نعم ۔قال فانی اصدقتہا حدیقتین و ھما بیدھا فقال رسول اللہ صلیٰ اللہ علیہ و سلم : خذھما ففارقہا ۔(باب فی الخلع،ج : ۱،ص: ۹۳۳،ح : ۲۲۲۶)
وفي الشامی تحت قوله : ولا بأسه عند الحاجة للشقاق بعدم الوفاق) أى لوجود الشقاق وهو الاختلاف والتخاصم . وفي القهستاني عن مشرح الطحاوى : السنه إذا وقع بين الزوجين اختلاف ان يجتمع اهلهما لتصالحوا بينهما، فإن لم يصطلحا جاز الطلاق والخلع اهـ .( باب الخلج ج : ٣ ص:۴۴۱۔ م :السعيد )