Fatwa No : 90392
Ruling regarding Talaq

Ruling regarding Talaq

My wife had a very serious fight with me over an issue. For ten to fifteen days, she did not give me food and harassed me in every possible way, to the extent that she mixed salt into my mother’s food and troubled my mother in every way. Only my mother lives in the house; my father and brother have passed away, and only my mother is alive.
I have two children as well—one is nine years old and the other is five years old. My wife is also pregnant. It has been forty-five days now. that she has gone to her parents’ home after fighting with me and has had no contact since then.
I have told her father and brother that she should accept her mistake and apologize to me and to my mother, and then return home, because she was extremely disrespectful to me as well. Many times she said, “My relationship with you is over; I have no connection with you.” She would not give food and would make household items disappear—plates and tea cups would go missing from the kitchen—to harass me and my mother.
She would play loud music early in the morning to disturb us, provoke the children against me, scold the children over trivial matters, and she does not listen to anything I say. Due to all these circumstances, I became fed up and told her to go to her parents’ home.
Now it has been forty-five days, and there has been no mention of an apology from my wife or her family, and they are not willing to accept any fault on their part.
In this situation, what is the Islamic ruling for me? And can divorce be given in the state of pregnancy? Because there is no talk of reconciliation from her side. Please provide guidance.

الجوابُ حامِدا ًو مُصلیِّا ً

If the questioner’s statement is indeed correct and based on reality, and no misrepresentation has been made, then the conduct described of the questioner’s wife is, according to Islamic law, blameworthy, due to which she is also becoming sinful. Therefore, she should sincerely repent and seek forgiveness before Allah, and humbly apologize to her husband for this behavior, and make an effort to save her home from being ruined and the future of the children from being destroyed.
At the same time, the questioner should also avoid acting hastily in this matter. Rather, he should involve the elders of both families as mediators and attempt reconciliation in order to save the household. However, if despite all possible efforts the woman does not refrain from her behavior, and no way remains for the questioner to continue living with her, then there is allowance for separating her from his marriage by giving her a divorce or through khula.
Even in such a situation, he should give only **one divorce**, and that too with clear words such as, “I give you divorce,” and not give more than one, so that if reconciliation occurs later, the possibility of remarriage remains.

مأخَذُ الفَتوی

کما فی المشکاۃ : عن انس رضی اللہ عنہ قال قال رسول اللہ ﷺ المراۃ اذا صلت خمسھا و صامت شھرھا واحصنت فرجھا واطاعت بعلھا فلتدخل من ای ابواب الجنۃ شائت ( باب عشرۃ النساء ، ج : 2 ، ص : 281 ، ط : قدیمی )
وفیہ ایضا : عن طلق ابن علی قال قال رسول اللہ ﷺ اذا الرجل دعا زوجتہ لحاجتہ فلتاتہ وان کانت علی التنور ( ایضا )
و فی احکام القرآن تحت قولہ تعالی ( الرجال قوامون علی النساء ) قد افاد ذلک لزومھا طاعتہ لان وصفہ بالقیام علیھا یقتضی ذلک ( واللاتی تخافون نشوزھن ۔۔ ) یدل علی ان علیھا طاعتہ فی نفسھا و ترک النشوز علیہ ( باب حق الزوج علی المراۃ و حق المراۃ علی الزوج ، ج : 1 ، ص : 374 ، ط : سھیل اکیڈمی )
و فی الدرالمختار : الاصل فیہ الحظر معناہ ان الشارع ترک ھذا الاصل فاباحہ بل یستحب لو مؤذیۃ او تارکۃ صلاۃ غایۃ ۔۔ ومن محاسنہ التخلص بہ من المکارہ الخ
و فی رد المختار تحت قولہ ( من محاسنہ التخلص ) ای من محاسنہ جعلہ بید الرجال دون النساء ۔۔۔۔ ومنھا شرعہ ثلاثا لان النفس کذوبۃ ربما تظھر عدم الحاجۃ الیھا ثم یحصل الندم فشرع ثلاثا لیجرب نفسہ اولا و ثانیا ( کتاب الطلاق ، ج : 3 ، ص : 229 ، ط : سعید )
وفی الدر المختار : و ینکح مبانتہ بما دون الثلاث فی العدۃ و بعدھا بالاجماع ( باب الرجعۃ ، ج : 3 ، ص : 409 ، ط : سعید )
و فی الموسوعۃ الفقھیۃ : اتفق الفقهاء على أن طاعة الزوج واجبة على الزوجة، لقوله تعالى ( الرجال قوامون على النساء بما فضل الله بعضهم على بعض وبما أنفقوا من أموالهم ) ( باب استمتاع کل من الزوجین بالاخر ، ج : 31 ، ص : 313 ، ط : دار السلاسل الکویت )